bonjour mon petit chous...

First - how the hell is it only tuesday? Reminds me of that great Onion article years ago: http://www.theonion.com/articles/it-only-tuesday,2304/

With the void of Lost in our lives, AMC has made a show that tries to keep you guessing. A who-dunit, if you will. I've talked briefly about The Killing, but now with my new discussion group (that's you my mon petit chous) we're going to get to the nitty gritty of this show.

Let's discuss what we know so far:

*The first images we see are a scared Rosie, running for her life through some woods near marsh land.

*Girl cop is leaving Seattle to marry her creepy boyfriend and live in California. Hot boy cop is brought in to fill her space. He is formally of the narcotics squad and we're not quite sure what he is about. He also dresses like a homeless person.

*The police are called because they find a pink sweater and an ATM card belonging to Stan Larsen (Rosie's dad). sidenote: have they talked about that atm card since? wouldn't they check purchases on the card?

*Rosie's parents and 2 brothers go camping. They leave on a friday, return sunday - never talking to her- but Rosie was sleeping over at Sterling's (her bff) allegedly. Now I dont know about you, but my mumma would have never let me sleep over on a school night. And I'm damn sure that my friends would NOT have provided an alibi for 3 nights, much less 3 nights where they didn't see me. I once had a friend in high school try and pull that trick on me....telling her parents she was at my house when she wasn't. Her mumma called and I sang like a bird. Ut uh. Homegirl does not play that shit.

*Rosie goes to the halloween dance at the high school (which is weird in itself), dressed like a slutty witch with a purple wig. A video taken at the school shows Rosie is not wearing her usual butterfly necklace, which is on her when she is found dead. Wig is later found in the dumpster behind school after used by Sterling to have sex with Jasper (creepy rich kid) and Chris (nasty homeless kid). Jasper and Chris are besties and apparently like to share women. Gross.

*The boys have this sex in a magical, romantic place called "the cage". It just turns you on, doesn't it. They also film this encounter. Have we not learned anything in the information age? No pictures or video tape. They are words to live by, you hear me? The cage is covered in blood - like murderous blood - but we find out its just Sterling's nose bleed. Seriously. That's what you want us to believe?

*The cage has a peephole where the pervert janitor who is amazingly named "Lyndon Johnson Gonzalez". Which I think the writers threw in for all those Kennedy conspiracy theorists. My dad is still convinced LBJ had something to do with it...but I digress.

*Boys are pulled in for questioning. Jasper's father, allegedly out of town, walks in and slaps the shit out of him. It's pretty great. Chris's mom loves him and wants him to come home, but doesn't really seemed concerned that he might be a murder suspect.

*Rosie is found in the bottom of a lake(?) in a stolen campaign car by Councilman Richmond, who is running for mayor. We've been over how I think this is bizarre how a guy running for MAYOR has campaign cars, but again, I digress. She is tied up, one shoe on, fingernails gone from fighting. She has died from drowning. The scene of her father and mother finding out will rip out your heart.

*She has a pair of expensive shoes. Still have no idea where they came from. Maybe the sister of Mitch?

*Her teacher, Bennett Ahmad, writes her letters. Were they love letters? He says they were letters of encouragement. In return, she gives him a video she took of random things. She also would take the bus out to visit him in the Seattle All-Star's program (worst named program ever).

*Bennett Ahmad is creepy and Muslim.

*Bennett's wife is a former student who is knocked up. For this reason, she cannot move anything.

*Bennett was at the dance with Rosie. He leaves around 11:30pm, but we know that his jealous wife was at the school, sitting in the car, waiting for him to come out because she didn't trust him with all those girls in skirts.

*Bennett tells the cops that he went home to refinish the hardwood floors, but the company canceled on him. Not true. Found in the house were chemicals that were found on Rosie.

*Wifey comments, as they are putting the crib together, that she was glad they put down carpet.

*Rosie apparently shows up to Bennett's house around 10:30pm to deliver a book - neither Bennett or wifey are there - and is perhaps let in by Mohammad? Is the book the Koran? Is Rosie trying to be Muslim?

*Mitch's sister looks like she had an affair with Jasper's father. When he doesn't say hi to her at the post-funeral meal, she locks herself in the bathroom and drinks herself blind while listening to Neko Case...which is exactly what I do.

*Richmond's wife was killed by a drunk driver. He also likes to have inappropriate sex, and seems to not have a clue about politics.

*Daddy Larsen used to be in the polish mob. He has a bestie - whose name we never quite know - who help the kids after Rosie's death. Feeds them, changes their sheets. Very precious but now I'm starting to question him.

*Boy cop is a former druggie/alcoholic. He has a sponsor, which we think is a cop. He has packets of money which he randomly put into a mailbox. I think its a wife and kids.

Okay...so this is just a basic recap. Start filling in the holes of what I've missed.

XOXO,
Bunny Bits