10 Ways in Which Bunny Is Vile and Wicked to Me… by Fancy Nancy
Hey kiddies! Just so you know. I had to push that horrid Bunny down to get this on her blog. Relax. She’ll be fine, but she’s lucky there wasn’t an open elevator shaft nearby. And, yes, we are in a fight because she is so awful to me.1. She frequently reminds me of my age. Can I help it that I’m a Nancy of a certain generation? That’s just mean.
2. She criticizes my allegedly tight clothing. One time when handing out t-shirts, she refused to give me a size S saying, “Only people who can wear a small get a small.” Rude! Why wear M when S will do? Otherwise, everyone would wear XL, right?
3. She describes my driving as her “death wish” when she rides with me. Just not nice at all…
4. She calls me vain and stupid. I may be many things, but mama is NOT stupid! Evil!
5. She tells everyone I’m a terrible gossip. OK. That one is kinda true, but I am NOT terrible at it. Hateful!
6. She dismisses me from her presence when talking about books. Well, I don’t like to read. I’m more of a visual person. Give me pictures any day! Holla, Mr. Evans!
7. She likes to tell people that I have awful taste in movies. Well, true story. I liked Avatar and 2012. While I may be Fancy Nancy, I’m still a guy.
8. She heaps scorn on me whenever I express enthusiasm for something she likes. It’s not like I want to BE her or anything. Wicked, just wicked.
9. She bosses me around like her slave-boy. That just isn’t right in so many ways because for starts with I want a slave-boy too! Holla two times, Mr. Evans!
10. She knows I’m sensitive, but still she hurts my feeling all the time. Can I help it that I’m deep??? Well, I hope she rots in Hell!
So, why do I put up with all of Bunny’s crap? Must be that I love the nasty gurl ‘cause it sure as Hell isn’t low self esteem!